What Happy People Know that You Don’t

Let's take a look at Tip #29 from 128 Tips to Make You a More Effective Leader:

“Anyone can choose the course of their lives, but only happy people do it.”

-  Dan Baker, PhD and Camperson Stauth from the book , What Happy People Know

Choosing the course of our lives is open to all of us, but it requires us to identify and overcome the blocks and fears holding us back.

Don’t hold yourself hostage. Conscious decisions about how to invest our time, money and talents lead to a life fully lived and enjoyed.

Identify what’s getting in your way and make a plan on how you’ll break through. Choose to be happy.

If choosing to be happy were as easy as it sounded, we would all be doing it.

Being happy is hard work!

It requires a sustainable inventory of balance and energy; two things which have become rarities in our busy lives.

Sadly, we often confuse happiness with feeling safe...

so we opt into dwelling in cages that we construct around ourselves.

As safe as these cages may seem, feeling stuck leads to restlessness.

Without rest, the balance and energy required to live happily are nonexistent.

Safety should not come at the cost of freedom.

Remember: the difference between a cage and a home is an open door.

The good news is, if we built our cages, we must also have the keys.

…they have to be lying around here somewhere.

Happy Thanksgetting

You may be comfortable with giving thanks…

But are you comfortable with getting thanks?

“Thanksgetting” is what happens when we find ourselves on the receiving end of gratitude.

A few weeks ago I was kicking off a strategic planning meeting with a leadership team I’ve had the pleasure of working with when the CEO caught me off guard:

“Abby, before we start I would like to go around the table and tell each of you what I most appreciate about you, your contribution to our team, and your contribution to our business.”

I loved this idea!

Genuine, heartfelt praise is so meaningful and it is such a rarity.

One by one he went around the table, looked each person in the eye, and gave carefully selected heartfelt, genuine praise to each person in the room.

His words were given as individualized gifts.

That is exactly how we should greet appreciation given to us:

As gifts.

Wow! How powerful! The energy in the room increased as each person took in their praise and savored it.

There were nods around the table as each person acknowledged the truth in the strengths of their teammates.

As you gather around your Thanksgiving table today, pause…and be present.

Take it all in:

the smells…

the laughter…

maybe a bit of  inevitable family drama…

and the awareness of your unique value…and the gift you are to our world.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Would You Rather Be…or Become?

A calm sea does not make a skilled sailor. ~Unknown

Look back on the waters you’ve had to navigate to get where you are.

Surely, you've enjoyed smooth sailing at times.

Chances are you’ve also had to roll up your sleeves and depend on nothing but your business acumen and courage to avoid disaster.

Be honest. Which one made you feel more alive?

After 14 years with Procter & Gamble I decided to start my own company. Moving into uncharted territory required every ounce of  my courage and conviction.

Knowing that success or failure rested solely on my shoulders was both scary and exhilarating.  It was also the best training I have ever received . The skills I learned gave me the confidence I needed to  back my courage.

For me, calm waters are fine for a breather, and after a while I’m ready to take on the next challenge.

What about you? Before you answer, don’t get caught thinking:

• calm waters = good things are happening
• rough waters = bad things are happening

It’s a trap. The difference is based on whether the waters you choose to navigate challenge you.

Figure out if you are happiest maintaining the skills you have, or honing the new skills you want.

Once you know that, you at least know which way is North…

When is the last time you really felt alive?